"Respond intelligently even to unintelligent
treatment." ~ Lao Tzu
To respond thoughtfully takes intentionality and time, e.g., to calm, find rest, or the collecting of ourselves so as to move beyond reactivity or impulsivity.
- The cultivation of full human capacity vs.
patterns of emotive arousal and reaction (such as dependence on
technology, retaliation and war).
- Being reflectively thoughtful and collaborative
with others
- Openness to ambiguity, mystery, and uncertainty
resulting in mindfulness and imagination opening up the way to serendipity
and hope vs. fixation on concreteness
- Acknowledgement/awareness of human and systemic
fragility, rigidity, anxiety; ergo self-differentiation resulting in compassion
What might this look like in every-day life? In the language of human
virtue, Emotional Intelligence” is the capacity to be more aware of the
motives and feelings of others, and of self, and to respond more skillfully; to
notice differences among others, especially with respect to their moods,
temperaments, motivations, and intentions, and then to act upon these
distinctions; to have finely tuned access to my own feelings and the ability to
use that knowledge to understand and guide my behavior. The golden or mean good, the virtue itself might be translated
compassion or self-differentiation (family systems) while an excess is being
desensitized or emotionally fatigue and the deficiency is poor coping
capacity and easily triggered.
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